


492. Hand on the button, now

by SevlinRipley



Category: It - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Dark, Angst with a Happy Ending, Demonic Possession, Flirting, Hugs, M/M, Meta, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-09-26 13:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17142590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SevlinRipley/pseuds/SevlinRipley
Summary: It’s not an instantaneous change… There’s so many moments, ellipses leading up to the moment in which it’s finally, simply - undeniable.





	1. Chapter 1

It’s not an instantaneous change… There’s so many moments, ellipses leading up to the moment in which it’s finally, simply - undeniable.

 

Georgie grows wider and taller, hits his noodle arm/chicken leg stage like Bill before him. Then starts to fill out with more ease and intent than Richie’s body could ever manage. They attribute it to the sports Georgie plays. He’s the jock of the group. Four years their junior but as intrinsic as the rest of them.

> They don’t remember much of that summer. But Georgie was there… he helped them. That’s all they know. All Georgie says he remembers, too. That he was just with them and they made it out of that well safe, in one piece, together, the end.

He plays baseball in the spring, and football in the fall. During the summer he’s on a swim team, and in winter he does weight-lifting.

Some voice in his head propelling him to constantly train his body. Make himself strong and invulnerable. Skillful in the ways he moves, carries the weight of his muscles, dodges barriers, and aims for targets.

The athlete in Georgie is serious, determined, and most of all, fearless. He gets this dark look in his eye, like winning means his survival. Life or death etched between his auburn-colored eyebrows, a deep-set dent as his face pinches, and his lungs suck in a great, preparatory breath.

There’s something about it, the first time Richie is talked into attending a game, from behind the chain-link fence he’s clinging to, that’s almost scary.

Because when Georgie is off the field, he’s almost light as air. Eyes bright and warm despite the near-black brown in the iris of his eyes. His smile looks easy. The swoop of his hair a fact, never an achievement. He smells vaguely sweet, with a little dash of salt. Like his body rejects the musk of the macho deodorant he wears.

He throws himself onto Stan’s back the way he did when he was a kid, like he’s not technically twice Stan’s size now, strength-wise. And when they watch movies, his head sinks into Eddie’s lap because that’s a given. Eddie has always pet at his hair during film night, and no amount of growing has been able to change that fact.

Nor the way Beverly tickles at his stomach in fake exasperation when Georgie purposefully passes gas with his legs over her lap. No apology, only eyes crinkled, amused as he waits for her to realize what he’s done, stomach tensed in anticipation of what’s to come.

When the whole lot of them come over, Georgie practically vibrates with energy until he gets his bear hug from Mike, and it wouldn’t be pie night if he and Ben didn’t split the last piece, crowded with their heads close together, talking about opening a bakery some day. Like Ben’s heart isn’t set on architecture, and like Georgie’s interested in anything other than taste-testing.

When Richie looks at Bill… When Richie’s nerves twist and the hairs on his arms raise because Georgie’s looking at the opposing team like he’s about to snap a neck in half, or worse, Bill doesn’t see it. Richie can tell.

Bill sees some little boy who’s afraid to go down into the basement, who’s too young to curse even though he learned all those words from Bill, himself. A little boy who’d never hurt a fly, and who could never in a million years be interested in anything other than learning and playing and chasing wax boats down waterways. He sees Georgie, age 9 to their 13, with a rain slicker on, and pudgy hands curled around paper Bill folded just for him, a treasure.

What makes it even worse, is the way that Georgie will sometimes find him. Him, Richie. Behind the fence. Before the whistle blows. And those dark, dangerous eyes will connect with Richie’s own and a shiver will run down his spine, and into his belly.

Georgie’s eyes don’t change. That determination? It doesn’t seep away, like the thin line on his mouth does, into a smile. Half-smirk, half something else. Georgie’s eyes stay the same.

Then they’re gone, back on the other players in front of him, and the whistle blows. Georgie tackles someone with such grace that Richie thinks his lungs have disappeared. Or, maybe turned to plastic.

Because nothing feels real, and Richie could just be some ball-joint doll that someone positioned on a loop-stand. There, at the school, just off to the side of the field cause the Losers refuse to pay for bleacher seats when setting up lawn chairs here gives them a much better view. Stood up to watch, but not so much cheer on, the boy who all his friends love because he’s sweet like cotton candy and sticks to them like caramel corn.

The way he never does with Richie… No. With Richie, he’s sweet like cough syrup, and sticks to him like spider webs.

And no one else can see.

 

When Georgie graduates high school, he’s eighteen and seven months old. An October baby, with Autumn-colored hair and eyes that claws at the back of Richie’s mind like an urban legend. He touches Richie for the first time since that birthday hug.

That timid one that was a bare patting of backs and quick parting. Followed by Richie shoveling butter-rum ice cream into his mouth so that he doesn’t have to acknowledge that it wasn’t _really_ Georgie who invited him to the party. That Richie was just there because the rest of the Losers were. That the hug he was given was a courtesy, because the rest of them are so much more heart-felt and sturdy.

He touches Richie, with a hand at the nape of Richie’s neck, the last one to be hugged. And Georgie’s mouth gets close to his ear, breath warm and sending a wave through Richie’s body that makes him feel twisted up inside. “You know I got into your Alma Mater. Maybe you could give me the _real_ tour of it?”

Joking with Richie like it’s something they just do. Like they’ve often had conversations wherein Richie’s mocked the fake way schools try to portray themselves as grand institutions, when really it’s about what bathrooms have hot water, which vending machines have fresh chips, and which frat houses keg beer that doesn’t taste like piss.

Richie stays stiff in Georgie’s hold, voice frozen somewhere down his throat. And when Georgie pulls back, looking him in the eyes - it’s Game Day all over again. Cold, fearless determination. Eyes black and serious. Mouth that same quirked smirk Georgie has given him from across the football field, and when Richie swallows, it hurts because his throat is so dry.

Georgie’s hand lands on his shoulder, with a firm squeeze, and his eyes flash something - something else - so fast Richie can’t even begin to diagnose what it was, as he’s turning around, and climbing onto Stan’s back with his robe flooding over Stan’s shoulders. “To my limo, Mr. Uris!” Georgie yells, pointing to the parking lot as Stan smiles up into his cheeks and shrugs the little goof off.

“The limo’s all in your head, so you’re technically already there,” Stan tells him, before squeezing lovingly, and proud, at George’s elbow.

All while Richie’s standing stock-still, realizing that this means one of two things.

Either Georgie Denbrough undeniably hates Richie Tozier’s guts. And wants to kill Richie at one of his old haunts, for shits and giggles.

Or… the reason he wants to spend time alone with Richie, of all people, means he - undeniably - feels something _else_.


	2. Meta, Part I

I was halfway questioning myself… If this Georgie was actually somewhat possessed by Pennywise; the fact that he smells sweet and salty, his personality is sweet like cotton candy and he sticks to people like caramel corn - references to the smells that Georgie smelt in the sewer when Penny was manifesting the parts of a carnival Georgie found attractive.

But overall, I wanted there to be a duality to this piece.

_Is this dark?_

Or is this just how it feels when someone is so scared to admit they have feelings for someone? How someone might act when they don’t know HOW to treat a person they feel MORE for than anyone else? And how that other person takes that awkward non-action and internalizes the behavior?

Does Georgie just not know how to be sweet and soft with Richie because he LIKES Richie and he doesn’t see Rich the same way as he sees the others? Who are like other big brothers and sisters to him.

And Richie takes that as a severe slight. It hurts him deeply and he retreats into this corner, in self defense, where he sees things more darkly than the others. All because he THINKS Georgie doesn’t like him.  
  
A tragic misunderstanding that gives way to something seemingly more heinous.

But at the same time, Georgie occasionally feels brave (where he’s good on the football field, talented and confident) and can look at Richie and WANT him.

Then when he graduates he decides to finally try. Try to flirt with Richie and see if Richie cares even a LITTLE about him.

And the whole time - every shiver Richie feels in his presence? Is just a reaction to deep attraction, but he’s denying it because he thinks Georgie hates him.

_Or is it light?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Declaration: The multi-verse reserves no right over my, nor my friend’s intellectual property or thoughts, as concerning this meta and its affiliated characters, and may not create a universe based on the conjecture and IDEAS stated in any association with this post, on any other platform, here or otherwise. - 06/28/2018, as signed by 🃏 and 🍒, within 24 hours of the initial post.


	3. Meta, Part II

In one possible Dark AU scenario, we could see Georgie and Richie leaving Derry to visit the University. The longer Georgie’s out of Derry, the more at ease he seems to become. More relaxed, with Richie, than he’s been in so long.

(It sort of freaks Richie out even more, at first.)

As it turns out, when Georgie’s in Derry, Pennywise _does_ have some set of claws in him. He’s putting this barrier up, preventing Georgie from treating Richie as he does the others. More closed off, and then suddenly intimidating. Rarely anything in-between.

_Why does Pennywise have Georgie, specifically, act this way toward Richie?_

If we base this closer to the idea of 2015!Richie, wherein Pennywise tells Richie not to touch the ‘boys’ lest anyone figure out that he’s -gay/bi/etc- we know that Pennywise likes to twist the innocent into something darker.

> So when Pennywise realizes that Georgie has a crush on Richie, he decides there’s several ways to play with that:

  * He can slowly strip away the ease of childhood crushes. As Georgie gets older, he grows more and more self-conscious of trying not to let Richie know how he feels. But still desperate enough to hope that someday Richie might reciprocate his feelings (which he would) so Georgie then also tries to avoid being seen as ‘the little brother’ and therefore comes off more distant and cold.



> First punishing Richie (and Georgie) by making him feel singled out in Georgie’s neglect.
> 
> In addition to that, the Losers already don’t take Richie very seriously. At first Richie will believe he can’t say anything. Can’t call bullshit on the way he feels Georgie is treating him compared to everyone else. His friends will think he’s being an asshole if he tries to point out that Georgie’s weird toward him… They’ll reject him, and the very idea of it. ‘Not our Georgie! Georgie’s the sweetest boy!’
> 
> This succeeds in isolating Richie mentally, but also (somewhat) physically, too, when they’re in Georgie’s presence.
> 
> Adds to the notions of lost/neglected/forgotten, because why doesn’t anyone else see? Why can’t they all see how Georgie acts almost as if Richie’s not even there? Do they just not _care_? (But this is Pennywise again; they don’t see because he doesn’t let them. Black button?)
> 
> So when, eventually, Richie gets brave enough, he approaches one Loser, than another, spread oh so far apart, the sting of it keeping him away - they genuinely don’t know what he’s talking about. And they’re not unconcerned, necessarily. But the, “I’m sorry you feel that way”s weigh on him much the same.
> 
> Never mind the fact that Richie honestly can see where they’d be coming from. Georgie _is_ sweet. He’s affectionate, and funny, and works hard. He’s loving, and compassionate, involved, and smart. Georgie Denbrough is damn near perfect. And Richie loves him, just like they all do. How could he not?
> 
> Which is why it hurts so, so much, that Georgie, for some reason, acts more often than not, like Richie never came up from the sewers that day.

  * When Georgie is old enough to act on his feelings, he instead begins to grow more predatory. As Richie begins to have feelings (which he denies, because it doesn’t compute) for Georgie, he finds Georgie’s actions both alarming and confusing (and attractive?) at the same time.



> Secondly, punishing Richie by making him dance over the razor’s edge precipice that is the question: ‘Does Georgie _want_ something from me, or is he just toying with me?’

So the longer they’re away, the more _Georgie_ Georgie becomes. And Richie’s afraid to let himself believe it, but the change is so stark and undeniable. And he’s been so in such debt of Georgie’s affections for so long that he finds himself melting into it before he can really even think to talk himself out of it. 

They fall together hard, and fast. Richie’s heart is pounding the whole time, and Georgie’s face is red and warm and pleased. They mesh. They mesh just like Richie suspected they should have, the whole time.

But then it’s time to go back to Derry. And the closer they get, the more Georgie of the past few days gets erased. Coin spinning and spinning until eventually it falls, and tails is revealed. Richie’s a play-thing again. Georgie leers at him, and then he’s quiet and cold and then enigmatic and sugar-sweet when the Losers welcome them home, and no. one. can. see.

Richie’s smart enough to realize that one of about two things is happening.

Either Georgie’s a bigger dick than imaginable, and was just messing with him the entire weekend (which a huge part of Richie is willing to believe [almost too-readily *nudge nudge* because Pennywise]) or there’s something seriously wrong. But he knows that he can’t ask his friends - not again.

So when Georgie announces he’s officially moving into the dorms at the university he and Richie toured, Richie jumps at the chance to help Georgie move. Get him back out of Derry and see what happens _this_ time. Confront Georgie where he feels safer to do so. Which has… never been Derry.

 _Boom!_ Georgie’s back… He’s even back in front of Bill, and his parents. Bill who, gets this sort of look of realization on his face, mixed with confusion and denial. Bill who’s finally starting to see a bigger picture but isn’t sure he wants to because if he does then that means…

But Richie doesn’t blame Bill.

He doesn’t even blame Georgie, really. Even if Georgie really does just hate him, Richie can’t fault him for it. He’s been cruel, but maybe Richie deserves that?

However, he has enough self worth, here, with Georgie trying to sit close to him on the undressed bed, as his family goes to grab lunch - Georgie and Richie supposedly unpacking while they bring food back. He doesn’t want to ruin it, the way Georgie’s acting, but he has to ask. Taking a cue from the hurt look in Georgie’s eye, when Richie quickly stands up, and away, pressing himself back into the dorm room desk.

“ _What the hell happens when we go home? Do you like me, or hate me - or?_ ”

He doesn’t expect Georgie to look at him, the skin around his eyes going lavender, the whites of his eyes pink, before he’s sniffling into his shirtsleeve. Didn’t think Georgie would end up _crying_ about it.

But _Georgie doesn’t know_. He feels like he keeps forgetting things, remembering things in vignettes, with the edges all erased, and all sorts of things in-between, too.

Feels like he hasn’t looked in the mirror and seen himself in so many years, in all the time he’s spent at home. Would sometimes catch his reflection in a mirror at an away game, and get trapped there, in recognition. Terrified by familiarity. Something that was missing when he went home and looked in the mirror above his dresser. Only by then, he didn’t care anymore.

It’s pretty obvious that good ole’ Derry, Maine is the problem.

There’s a lot of face-holding and curling up around each other on the uncomfortable dorm bed, whispered apologies and adamant forgiveness. A lot of swearing Derry off for the rest of their lives, no matter what. Screw blood oaths. Maybe that’s what Pennywise wanted anyway.

They get every Loser out of Derry, and have a clear-headed discussion. Take a Derry-free blood oath to _not_ go back. Because if Pennywise is strong enough to do this before It’s awaken, then there’s no logical way to destroy it, and if Richie and Georgie are out - Stan admits he’s out, too - and they always said it’d take all of them, then there’s no reason for any of them to try. It’s not worth it. _Just live_. That’s all Richie asks of them.

Richie finds work, and a place nearby the University. Georgie’s almost entirely absent from his dorm room, clinging to Richie every moment he gets. Spending every second they’re together making up for the time Penny tried to destroy them. Reminding themselves that It failed. That they found each other after all these years, anyway, and that they never had to let go of it.

And they don’t choose to, either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Declaration: The multi-verse reserves no right over my, nor my friend’s intellectual property or thoughts, as concerning this meta and its affiliated characters, and may not create a universe based on the conjecture and IDEAS stated in any association with this post, on any other platform, here or otherwise. - 06/28/2018, as signed by 🃏 and 🍒, within 24 hours of the initial post.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from “When I’m Small” by Phantogram


End file.
